Lincoln, NE - Nebraska Attorney General Jon Bruning announced that he intends to file a lawsuit against the Obama Administration, calling Administrative Professional's Day - formerly known as Secretary's Day - an "unconstitutional and downright scary attempt at redistributing wealth." The unofficial holiday is normally celebrated on the Wednesday of the last full week in April and is sometimes observed by giving notes of appreciation or token gifts to those in the adminstrative or clerical profession.
"It's freakin' crap," Bruning said, "Every year I forget about it and the morning of this 'holiday' I have to stop on my way to work and buy a card or some other bullshit. This year, it's just going to be a normal Thursday or whatever the hell day it's on."
The defendant in the suit is planned to be B. Hussein Obama. When asked where and when the trial would be held, Bruning answered, "I really don't know. I'm not what you'd really call a 'details guy.' I just know that I can't wait to get his ass on the witness stand. He's going to hear it, that's for sure."
Messages sent to B. Hussein Obama's Facebook page seeking comment were not answered.